it never changes.

Every day is the same. It's like a big cycle. I wake up, survive through the day, and go bad to sleep. Nothing ever changes. The same people hate me. The same people are fake to me. The same people make jokes about me that aren't funny. The same people leave me out. The same people talk about me. The same people laugh at me. The same people make inside jokes without me. The same people never notice that I'm gone. And then the same people try to comfort me. The same people try to help me. And every time the same thing happens, and every time the comforting never works. Nothing ever changes.


But then I look back. And everything is different. The people I used to be friends with are gone. The people I used to trust I now mistrust. The people who used to accept me don't anymore. The same people who used to comfort me don't care about how I feel now. The people who used to always be there for me have left, and they don't plan on coming back.


So why is that? Why is it that everything is the same yet everything is so different? Maybe it's because the changes are small. So small that we hardly notice them while they are happening. Maybe everything changes every day, we just don't realize it until later when we can see the difference that has been made, when we can see the changes in our life.


Sometimes I wonder why things change. I wonder why bad things happen. I wonder why people stop caring and why people leave. And each time I wonder about these things, I feel even more lost than I did before. I don't know why things change, or why bad things happen, or why people stop caring and leave, but I do know one thing--sometimes there's just nothing we can do to change the change that is happening...